Summer TV and The Action Hero

It doesn't take a genius to realize that the summer is a complete wasteland for television, and as a TV-junkie who watches about two to three hours of glaring images a day, I figure 'blogging about what I'll be watching this summer isn't a bad idea.

On CBS, I'll be watching one show that I do each and every summer: "Big Brother". While not especially clever or interesting, it's always a great experience to get to know the contestants, one thing that other reality shows ignore so much of. However, if you're wondering: buying the "24/7 LiveFeed" of the house isn't a good idea; not only is it boring, but it detracts from all the good parts of the actual broadcasts, which take place three nights a week.

Everything on FOX, to me, is utter crap during the summer. "24" is a great show, but it's not back until January. I sometimes get into "American Idol", too--another show that starts in January.

On ABC, I've decided to tune into re-runs of "Lost" each Wednesday. I caught a few episodes of the show back when it aired first-run during the last few months, but I was never fully enraputred. I am told that the reason for this is that I never watched the first episode, which is a requirement for getting hooked.

On NBC, I've begun to watch "Hit Me Baby One More Time", an entirely amusing show in which washed-up stars compete each week by performing their hit and a cover of a new song. The prize is $20,000 to be donated to a charity of their choice. And, depending on my level of TV-desperation, I may tune in to the sure-to-be-stupid "I Want To Be A Hilton". I wouldn't place any bets on that, though.

The WB offers "The Beauty and the Geek" this summer, which has already started airing, and it's quite amusing. No matter how staged and stupid it may be, I think it's funny. Oh, wait...I just missed last night's episode, didn't I? Shit. Well, I guess one week of it doesn't much matter.

I'll wrap up this segment with some random thoughts on other shows: "Britney and Kevin", the new White-Trash couple's attempt to eclipse Nick and Jessica airs on UPN each Tuesday, and the only reason to watch it is to see how much of a loser Britney truly is. "Hell's Kitchen" is stupid and staged, from what I've seen. Of all of the "Apprentice" spin-offs, why one involving cooking? "The Cut" is boring if you hate fashion, as I do. There's not even any attractive women wearing "fashion" in it. How much worse can you get? I do, however, plan to watch re-runs of "The Amazing Race" on The Game Show Network every night in July, just 'cuz even though I didn't like the show when I first saw it, the last few episodes of the last season were pretty flippin' kickass. I watched the first episode of Morgan Spurlock's "30 Days" on FX last night and it wasn't too good, as expected. Spurlock is a likable guy, but the show leaves a lot to be expected, as he tries to make too much of a political statement on too little substance with it. I'm dreading the next few episodes, which don't even star he or his fiancee.

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I saw Batman Begins yesterday, on opening day, as school got out early with Final's Schedule and there was a 1:30 showing. After reading the rave-reviews and hearing all of the great buzz, I was psyched to finally see it. And then it started. I could've sworn that, by twenty minutes in, I was about to doze off. I struggled to keep with the movie and barely got through all of it paying attention.

Throughout the afternoon, I thought about why I found the movie to be so boring. Was it that director Christopher Nolan's brutal, visceral style is only fitting with smaller, quieter movies (his two previous works, Memento and Insomnia, are absolutely brilliant)? Was it that Christian Bale wasn't the right choice to play Batman? Was it that I just don't like DC Comics?

Nope, nope, nope--at least I don't think. What I've come to the conclusion of is that Batman just isn't likable in this movie. In order for a comic book adaptation (or any high-adrenaline action movie) to work, the protagonist must either be a very sympathetic type of person (i.e. Peter Parker) or a very empathetic type of person (i.e. Bruce Banner). In Batman Begins, Bruce Wayne just doesn't cut it. First of all, his voice, as John Popick of Planet Sick Boy says, sounds like that of a man during a colonoscopy. Not that I know what the voice of a man during a colonoscopy sounds like. I just picture it that way. Secondly, he's just not that good of a guy.

Now, I understand that this is the beginning of Batman, showing how he came to be. I understand that the movie is about moral dilemma and trauma. But, still, you have to be rooting for the good guy. In other words: Bruce Wayne, here, is too realistic a hero. It doesn't work at all in the context of the story. I have admiration for Nolan's experimentalism, but the experience just wasn't all that pleasurable. I suppose, more than anything, the problem is that Batman isn't a very interesting character, here. This is really too bad, too, because there's some masterful, dark, brooding visuals which work toward's the movies advantage. And the finale just outright kicks ass.

The movie is one I might revisit in theatres, just because I actually have an opinion to develop. Not exactly an opinion on the film, itself, but a theory on the genre. I hate mushy-gushy-airy-soap-opera-hero-bullshit comics as much as the next guy, butI guess I may prefer them to the type that Batman Begins is. I suppose, what it all comes down to is, the picture isn't cool enough for the audience to be willing to go with the whole psychological thread. But at least it tries more than the average comic-book-flick. That's one thing it certainly does.